11/26/07

Just like heaven...

This morning, whilst engaging in some avant-garde autoerotic sexplay, I got Icy-Hot in my armpit. (I pulled a muscle in my back). When you get Icy-Hot in your armpit, there's literally only one thing you can do: hop in pain. You hop around, thinking you're on your way to do something to relieve the pain, and then you realize there's nothing you can do, but you're in so much pain that you instantly forget that and hop somewhere else to do something else to alleviate yourself. You realize your armpit is turning bright red, and you hop somewhere to get something to make it turn white again, because you've forgotten that no such thing exists, but then you mercifully forget that you were hopping for it in the first place. Hop hop hop. Considered breaking my pinkie finger to get my mind off it. Persevered. Human interest story.

3 comments:

Carolyn said...

You should try this stuff instead:

http://www.024zone.com/

Icy hot doesn't work for shit. But whatever you do, DO NOT get that stuff in your eyes. Speaking from experience.

D said...

Icy Hot really doesn't work for shit. And it's funny how, I drive a car, I drink well gin, I use a switchblade to cut my nails -- but still, the most dangerous thing I do in a day, is applying Icy Hot.

I'll check that stuff out. I'm in pain over here.

nickbujak said...

hit up some chiropractic. That shit is like magic yo.