Little donkey

I got id'ed today
Buying a burrito.
I gave him my credit card --
This little guy with enormous braces
Who minced like a miniature Q-Tip
(The rapper, not the cotton swob) --
And he was like, "Can I see some id."
And I was like, are you serious.
I couldn't find my id
So I had to give him my debit card
Because it has my picture on it.
He pretended to trust me,
Swiped it,
And then glanced down
At the photo, to make sure it was me,
The real me, who was
Buying a burrito.
Reassured, he showed me
A face full of glinting blue metal.
Who steals a credit card
To buy a burrito?
"That's strike three.
"Three felony counts.
"You're going down for life.
"Hope it was worth it.
"It did look pretty tasty."
Who can pass up a deal,
Even with somebody else's money?