I know this is relative and it wouldn’t be significant if it were true, but I think it would have been neat if nature had given humans no prerogative to evolve past 3 feet tall. Like, the average man would be 3 feet tall, and the equivalent of a 7 foot giant as we understand them would be a towering 42 inches. Offensive linemen would weigh 160 pounds. Ceilings in skyscrapers would be 5 feet tall, significantly saving on lumber, steel, and drywall construction costs. Sports cars would have 7.5 inch wheels, and huge spinner rims on SUVs would be a head-turning 11 inches. Cats would be puma-sized, tigers significantly bigger. McDonalds would celebrate its "whopping" world-famous eighth-of-a-pounder. The average baby would weigh 3.5 pounds. The morbidly obese would weigh not less than 120 pounds. Bond James Bond, 007 would be a sexual metaphor on a whoooooole different level. Dwarfism would be said to affect those 2 feet tall and under. Machine guns would fire .381 millimeter shells, and KRS-One would have rhymed, “got myself an Uzi and my brother a four-and-a-half.” Going fishing would be borderline-suicidal. Eating an apple would be a project. If you finished a baseball steak, you would get it for free. An eighth of weed would be a whole hell of a lot of weed, and a 20 oz. of Old English would knock you on your ass.

Best of all, J.R.R. Tolkien might not have been famous.

The world would be a much more charming place.

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