The Second Great Awakening of old-ass clothes.

"'Confute me in argument, child!' cried I. 'You mistake there, my dear... I never dispute your abilities at making a goose-pye, and I beg you'll leave argument to me.'"
~Oliver Goldsmith

Fashion in modern America is getting out of hand. Perhaps as a concession to the hustle and bustle, you can literally look presentable in less than a minute, if you swing it right. From a lottery of clothes on the floor, you select pants, a shirt, and some flip flops. You put them on. You're done. This, to me, is unacceptable. I want a return. A return to the social and sartorial constraints that caused Gottfried Wilhelm Leibnitz to look like this.

Though for my money the best-dressed person in history has to be Spain's Isabella. There's a painting of her as a blinged-out infant in the MMA that I've been meaning to revisit. But for now, here's here as an adult, done up nines, fly style, sly smile.

"The vet says I can't lick myself."

Can't you just picture these two getting on the bus in front of the dorm? "You goin' out tonight?" "Yeah, I think we're going to Vito's." "Sweet." "You goin' out tonight?" "Nah, I got this test."

Tell me life wouldn't be better.

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